Spring of 2020. For many of us, it was a sudden, non-negotiable transition to an all-remote professional and family life that demanded immediate adaptation. Sometimes, painful adaptation. In contrast, the return-to-office trend has been realized in fits and starts, highlighted by a lot of trial and error from both employers and employees. To the degree that a new corporate standard has emerged, it’s hybrid – and it’s probably going to be here a while.
If you’re unfamiliar, hybrid policies generally mean an employer requires employees to be in the office for a certain percentage of the week – most often, three days – while allowing flexibility to work remotely the remainder of the time. In my world, hybrid has equated to a fluid, still mostly remote with occasional onsite meetings and a little travel sprinkled on top schedule, while my wife Ashley follows a more consistent work from home on Mondays and Fridays, in the office Tuesday through Thursday pattern. With a twelve-year-old daughter immersed in the logistically demanding and time-intensive sport of competitive gymnastics, a seven-year-old son whose passion lies in the ball sports (all of them, but especially baseball), and an eight-year-old pug with a propensity for barking at every single animal that ever appears on our television, seldom does a day look like the day before. Personally, that’s right up my alley – variety energizes me. On the other hand, I’ve heard there’s a thing about kids benefiting from structure and routine.
To make the best of hybrid, my wife and I try to strike the right balance of predictability and agility. When we make time for it, our Sunday evening schedule chat lays the groundwork for the week, minimizes downstream confusion, and reveals the riddles we need to solve to get everyone where they need to be as efficiently and enjoyably as we can. It’s also a nice opportunity to collaborate after a busy weekend. Here are the four dimensions of hybrid life I find myself thinking about and factoring into our weekly planning efforts most of the time:
1. Communication and Flexibility
Whether it’s with colleagues at work, your co-parent, your children, or the neighbor kid who does a great job mowing your lawn but whom you don’t want to show up while you’re running a virtual meeting, the inconsistency of the hybrid schedule amplifies the importance of communication. Be mindful of the need to follow up on where you’ll be, where someone else will be, and when everyone needs to be ready. Erring on the side of overcommunication will reduce stress and prevent schedule miscues. Additionally and importantly, expect your plan to change. Think ear infections, rain delays, or an early deadline for your next TPS report (you’ve seen Office Space, right?). Embrace a flexible mindset – the trade-off of the flexibility provided by the hybrid lifestyle is the number of moving parts it creates, and moving parts spawn unpredictability.
2. Technology and Connectivity
Set yourself up for success with technology tools that streamline the transition from working at the office to working from home. It’s amazing how much time can be saved in a month by a docking station, a duplicate power cord, a second mouse, or an extra set of headphones. If you can, include these kinds of accessories in your supplies request from your employer.
And let’s talk about screens. Those hated and beloved screens. They’re indispensable for most hybrid workers, but they’re a double-edged sword when it comes to your children. Screens can fill a void for an older kid or occupy a younger kid at a pivotal moment when a parent is wrapping up a slide deck that the boss wanted yesterday. But as we all know intuitively, and as science is beginning to substantiate, the screen solution comes at a cost. Parents should try to agree on and implement screen-time maximums. Don’t be afraid to let your kids be bored and discover themselves without the help of technology on occasion. Remember, you make the rules. When it’s time for your biggest remote meeting of the week, you can require that your older child take the dog for a walk before a graceful re-entry to your home. Pro tip: Make sure the TV isn’t still on Animal Planet when they get back.
3. Child Care and Family Support
For families with younger children and no stay-at-home parent, hybrid can present a child care conundrum. Should you pay for more child care than you need? Should you skip child care on work-from-home days, cross your fingers and invest in a Disney+ subscription instead? Can your village help each other out? Do you even have a village? Perhaps more than any other dimension, the answers to these questions are highly dependent on your situation. I recommend reviewing your child care strategy every few months, and be methodical about child care considerations as you work through your schedule each week. That may sound obvious, but in my house, it’s not that rare that we’re saved by a buzzer-beating epiphany of, “Wait, someone needs to pick up our son,” or, “It’s fine, he can ride the bus home today.”
4. Self-Care and Well-Being
For me, the greatest upside of a hybrid lifestyle is that it lets me thread the needle of in-person adult interaction, focused work hours, and time for exercise, or critical kenpom.com analysis before the next Wahoo basketball game. Less commuting than 2019, fewer socially awkward virtual interactions than 2020, and more clarity in professional expectations than 2022 make Hybrid 2024 a win for many of us. As you plan your week, be intentional about reserving time for your own well-being, which will make you a better parent, family member, and employee.
Note that I’m not coming anywhere near offering a template or suggesting an approach for making hybrid work best for your family; as with most things parenting, one size does not fit all when it comes to optimizing your situation. If you’ve read this far, whether you operate in a hybrid mode or not, my hope is that you’ll empathize with those who do. I say that not as a complaint, as I’m grateful for hybrid’s benefits and prefer the model hands down over being in the office all day, every day – for myself and for my family. But it’s not simple. And after all, what is simple in the quest for that elusive work-family balance?
