Have a crack at our quiz (or if you’re feeling brave, you might ask the wife or kids to take it!) And see where you rate. Which is it – dad, dud, or somewhere in between?
1. The 3-year-old has been potty training for weeks. When he finally puts number two where it belongs. You…
A. don’t just join the potty party, you lead the conga line, then Skype the grandparents in on the news.
B. don’t see the need to pull out all the stops, but high-five the little stinker after he washes his hands.
C. take a photo to post on Facebook with the caption, “My work here is done.”
2. You developed a secret handshake with your child because…
A. you actually remember yours from middle school.
B. you saw LeBron doing one with his kid.
C. it was a good way to get the car keys back.
3. The kids have been begging relentlessly for a dog and you know it will fall on your wife to be its primary caregiver. When she barks, “Ask your dad!” in exasperation, you say…
A. “I know Mommy would absolutely cherish the chance to take care of another living thing 24/7, but I’m just not ready.”
B. “If you kids promise to take care of him, I’m sure we can handle it.”
C. “Let’s do this!”
4 The best Father’s Day ever…
A. begins every morning.
B. includes chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast and just about any activity other than shopping.
C. might involve a real-life reenactment of that nineties board game, Don’t Wake Daddy.
5. It’s your turn to cover the parent-teacher conference, you…
A. show your best active listening skills, take notes, and ask at least two relevant questions.
B. forget which child’s teacher you were supposed to meet and go to the wrong school.
C. tell the kids they’re doing fantastic and the teacher cancelled the conference.
6. It’s seven o’clock on a Sunday and little Henry remembers a PowerPoint about his grandparents he’s supposed to turn in Monday morning. You…
A. get Grandma and Pap on the phone pronto and key in the interview while your son chats it up.
B. improvise Grandma and Grandpa’s story (who knew Pap was a spy?) To make the assignment a winner.
C. tell your son, “I guess now you’ll learn that there is an F in the word procrastination.”
7. Imagine that you never had kids. Are you…
A. living an empty life and bored out of your mind?
B. digitally self-medicating with Call of Duty?
C. still eating chicken nuggets, pizza, or mac ’n cheese every night?
8. On weekends, you’re usually the dad who…
A. initiates DIY projects to promote father/child bonding.
B. initiates DIY projects to give the kids something to do.
C. isn’t sure what DIY stands for.
9. If you had to go by one name for the rest of your life, you’d pick…
A. Daddy
B. Pop
C. Your Dudeness Sir Dudenstein
10. You appreciate your own father because he…
A. teaches you important things.
B. can still make you laugh even on rough days.
C. knows when to go home.
11. Your on-screen dad persona most closely resembles…
A. Modern Family’s Phil Dunphy.
B. Mike Heck from The Middle.
C. Walter White from Breaking Bad (metaphorically, of course!).
12. It’s beach week with the family! You…
A. lead the boogie board vanguard, supervise the sand castle construction, and organize the cornhole tournament – and that’s just the first day!
B. plant yourself on the beach with your trusty cooler and read Sports Illustrated with one eye while monitoring the kids with the other.
C. call in periodically from the golf course to check on the fireworks supply.
13. Mom is gone for the weekend! Time to…
A. break out the sleeping bags and the flashlights. “We’re turning the living room into our weekend campground!”
B. toss that list of instructions – that’s what texting is for.
C. Call 9 -1-1
ANSWER KEY
Mostly As:
You’re That Dad and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Odds are good you have never called being with your kids while your partner was out-of-pocket “babysitting.”
Lots of Bs:
You’re The Real Deal and your family loves you for it. This fatherhood journey isn’t everything you expected. It’s a whole lot more!
A Mix of ABCs:
You’re A Dad’s Dad and proud of it! Keep calm, father on, and give yourself a trophy for showing up.
Straight Ds:
There are no Ds – but you get a D for Dad just for reading this far!
